Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
No stitches, just platelets and will power
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
last night I used snow as a chaser
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
