i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
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