when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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