I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
