so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Randomize
