Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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