I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
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