Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize