I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I am one with the molecules
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
