your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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