so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
We need to get me chipped asap
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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