if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
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