brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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