oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
whose parrot is this?
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
