and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Randomize
