Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
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