i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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