When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
