Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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