my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
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