wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
My legs feel like baby dolphins
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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