4 words: hood of his car
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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