hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize
