Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Randomize