is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize