Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
