Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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