Sry I called you an 8
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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