You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I deserve this hangover.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
