Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
