Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
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