I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
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