i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Randomize
