I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
