how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
You ate ashes out of my bong
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize