physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
my poor anus
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize