In the future we'll all be gay
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize