I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
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