yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
That accounts for only three of the penises
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize