I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
