dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
