Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Randomize
