Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
