Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
