im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
