Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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