I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Randomize
