I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Randomize
