im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
