I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
operation harelip BJ is a go
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
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