She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
